Tuesday, November 20, 2012

The anatomy of a political hatchet job.

I really didn't want to make mention of the overall ugliness that has followed the firing of City of South Miami's city manager, Hector Mirabile, but the events following the manager's firing have proved to be difficult to ignore.  Let's not forget that the city manager wasn't fired by a lone crazed commission member but was instead was fired by a majority of the city of South Miami commissioners despite what certain political operatives within the city may have its citizens believe.

What's most disturbing now that the City Manager has been fired is the coordinated effort by people behind the scenes to discredit and smear the reputations of those on the commission who chose to fire the manager. The first to feel the wrath of this campaign turns out to be none other than the Mayor of South Miami, Phillip Stoddard.  In a lame attempt at character assassination, City of South Miami commissioner Valerie Newman staged a horrible attempt to distract the citizens from the subject of firing the city manager by bringing up a burglary at the mayors home that occurred back in March 3, 2011 during the commission meeting that was convened to fire the manager, conveniently in front of TV cameras from WSVN channel 7.  I attended that meeting and didn't think much of the cameras that were present, frankly I thought they were simply there to cover the firing of the city manager, that is until a few days later when they aired this lame excuse for journalism...


So in an instant, Commissioner Newman turns this hearing into a circus by changing the focus of the hearing from the firing of the city manager to something about a burglary and the mayor being naked in his bedroom in front of two minor children.  From the WSVN story...
Commissioner Valerie Newman who opposed the firing, went after the mayor bringing up an incident that happened at his house.
Valerie Newman: "About him being naked in his room with with two minor girls."

How the hell did we get from there to here?  Once again from the WSVN story...
Police reports obtained by 7News indicate Stoddard admitted to being naked at the time.
Stoddard said the exchange student and his daughter were sleeping in his bedroom in a makeshift bed because the mayor's parents were in town and using the girl's room. 
The exchange student told police she saw a man in a green mask and, "That she screamed and ran into the bathroom until she heard Stoddard's voice," when she came out of the bathroom, "She noticed that Stoddard was not clothed."

Well, with something as salacious as that, we were left with no choice but to get these "police reports" WSVN was referring to and see for ourselves what went on.  

Before we move on to the police reports, let's summarize what the WSVN story tells us about this incident:

  • Mayor Stoddards's home gets broken into.
  • An exchange student and the mayor's daughter were sleeping in the mayor's bedroom.
  • The exchange student discovers the burglar inside the home, screams then locks herself in the bathroom.
  • Upon hearing the scream, the mayor runs out of his room naked and the burglar takes off.
  • The mayor allegedly tells police offices repeatedly that he sleeps naked in his "nest".

According to Commissioner Newman, all these statements are facts because as she says they are "right here in the police report" as she waves around what we can only presume is the police report although it looks to be a blank sheet of paper...

Regardless of what's on that piece of paper that Commissioner Newman is hysterically waving around, let's look at the actual police report which allegedly contains all these nasty "facts" about what went down at the Mayor's home.  We'll begin with the original police report that was written when the incident occurred.  Make note of the date the report was written, March 3, 2011.

Mayor Stoddard Burglary Police Report

Ok, very well, to me this police report written by Officer Hechavarria of the City of South Miami reads like any other burglary police report, nothing out of the ordinary, basically the report states the following:

  • An exchange student residing at the mayor's house walks into the living room and spots the burglar.
  • She screams then runs into the bathroom and hides.
  • The mayor hears the scream, bolts out of his bed and into the living room to see what happens.
  • The mayor discovers the exchange student barricaded in the bathroom then calls the cops.
  • The mayor lists the items that were stolen.
  • The mayor then states that had found his back door open and says that he had locked it the night before.
  • The mayor's parents state that they had left the front door unlocked when they left the house.

Simple enough right?  The intruder comes in the unlocked front door, the exchange student sees him, freaks out, screams then locks herself in a bathroom, the mayor hauls ass out of his room to see whats going on and calls the cops.  Nothing strange here, right?  No mention of nudity, no mention of anyone sleeping in the same room as under aged girls, etc.  We even manage to learn how the intruder got in and how he left the house.  Nothing untoward going on, just an unfortunate burglary and a scared shitless exchange student.

Next in the police file we find a document that's labeled "NARRATIVE CONTINUATION", at quick glance it looks like it's part of the original police report until you notice that it was actually written and added to the file over SIXTEEN MONTHS LATER on July 12, 2012!!!  What in the fcuk is that about?  Were things so slow over at the South Miami PD that day that this Detective Lopez decided to write this supplement? Whatever.  Let's look at this supplement as it appears in the file...

Mayor Stoddard Burglary Report Continuation

WHOA!  Suddenly 16 months later, there's a whole lot more in the way of details than when the original report was written.  Let's summarize what this report alleges:

  • Detective states that the point of entry was the front door and exit was the rear door.
  • Mayor was asleep in his room till he heard the exchange student screaming.
  • Mayor runs out of his room naked and possibly scared off the burglar.
  • Mayor states that his parents had left the front door open.
  • Mayor states that he had left the back door open for his dog to go in and out.
  • Exchange student screams scaring the burglar then runs into the bathroom.
  • Mayor states that "they" were sleeping in his bedroom when the exchange student walked out to get ready for school and encountered the burglar.
  • Sgt James stated that from outside the mayor's home he managed to spot the mayor putting on his pants.

Now, this version of events chronicled in this police report written SIXTEEN FUCKING MONTHS after the original incident occurred is radically different than what was described in the original police report.  First off we have the first mention of any nudity, this report written SIXTEEN FUCKING MONTHS after the initial report clearly describes the mayor sleeping nude in his "nest" with the exchange student.  We now also have the allegation that the mayor scared off the burglar with his phallus, imagine that.  This second report also contains a contradiction of events as stated in the first report, now in this second report we have a "sliding glass door partially open for his pet to go outside" which is in stark contrast to the way the door was described in the first report which stated that the door was locked the night before and found open after the burglary.

It's this second police report that the hysterical news people over at WSVN latched on to and then decided to create this sensational segment labeled "Naked Truth".  If the morons over at Channel 7 would have taken a few moments and really thought about the two conflicting police reports, perhaps they would have been able to see what really happened.  To understand why the two reports are so different, one has to understand what happened in the period of time that transpired between the two reports.  

Back in March of 2011, police chief Orlando Martinez de Castro could do no wrong, according to the city manager, the chief single handily cleaned up all the crime in the city, got the police department on the straight and narrow and generally straightened out all of the problems the city had ever experienced, lol.  Since then, due to the efforts of some asshole with a blog, a new image of the chief has emerged  we now see a chief that seems somewhat less than ideal, one with several ethical lapses, some that may rise to the level of criminality, a chief that allegedly orchestrated the framing of three innocent girls for steeling tens of thousands of dollars from his wife's business, etc, but most importantly a chief who is on the verge of losing his job in disgrace.  In my opinion that makes him a desperate chief that will do anything to save his job, perhaps by creating a scandal involving one of his biggest detractors, Mayor Stoddard, but how do you do disgrace a guy who's got a spotless record?  In my opinion the people behind this mess latched on to the only thing they could which turns out to be this burglary, why not turn this whole incident into something more sensational and what could be more sensational than alleging the Mayor is parading around his house naked in the presence of under age children?  

Let's not forget these allegations were made SIXTEEN FUCKING MONTHS after the incident had occurred, which brings up another salient point.  Let's assume for a moment that the allegations contained within the second supplemental report were actually true, this leads us up to an issue far greater than the mayor parading around his house in the nude.  If indeed these events did occur as Detective Lopez would want us to believe, I'm going to suggest that every member of the City of South Miami police department present at the crime scene should be stripped of their law enforcement certifications and thrown in jail.  Why do you ask?  If they knew that the mayor was running around naked in front of any underage girls then their simple failure to call the Department of Children and Families immediately should constitute the automatic loss of their police certifications.  Think about it for a moment, what kind of cop would hear this story of a grown man running around naked before minor children then leave the scene without either arresting the adult  who he alleged was nude or at the very least calling DCF?  

The fact that neither the mayor was arrested and nobody called DCF in my opinion is proof that the allegations in the second report were pure bullshit, nothing more than a slanderous fictitious attempt at disparaging the mayors reputation.  The problem is that the people behind this scheme are idiots who couldn't scheme there way out of a wet paper bag.  The best part of this failed scheme to defame the mayor?  The best part of it is this third page that's part of the case file that's labeled "INTER-OFFICE MEMORANDUM", take a look for yourselves...

Mayor Stoddard Burglary Report Memo

I'm not sure why this memo was created as it negates the allegations that were made in the supplemental police report.  This memo confirms the events as described in the original report and also confirms that the Mayor was sleeping naked in his bedroom, yet makes no mention of any underage children sleeping in his bedroom.  

So think about it for a moment, you're in your own home, in your own bedroom sleeping how ever the hell you like when all of a sudden you're awoken by someone screaming, it's understandable that your first instinct is to run out of bed and find out what's going on.  In this case who could fault the mayor for running out of his bedroom when he heard the scream?  Perhaps in the instant it would have taken to put his clothes on, something unthinkable could have happened, those seconds it would have taken to throw on a pair of pants could have been the difference between life and death!  And what happened when the poor guy did run out of his bedroom and into his living room in his birthday suit?  He found the burglar had run away and the exchange student that discovered him was locked in the bathroom shitting bricks.  Most importantly, what's the take away from this "interoffice memo"?  To me it's the following part that Detective King concludes her report with:
"At the time of my investigation (exchange students name redacted) didn't make any statement that lead me to believe that there was any illegal activity was (sic) taking place between Stoddard and (exchange students name redacted)."
With that statement Detective King basically wipes her ass with the supplemental report that Detective Lopez concocted  SIXTEEN FUCKING MONTHS after the original police report was written.

So now that there seems to be a plausable explanation to this lame attempt at a political hatchet job, the question that we're left with is how the hell did Carmel Cafiero from WSVN, who is someone that I used to respect, fall for this steaming pile of shit and who fed her this nonsensical fairy tale?  Once again, the answer lies in her own report...
Handwritten police notes about the case provided by commissioner Newman...
And therein lies the answer.  Handwritten notes that according to the author of the "inter-office memo", Detective King,  appear to have disappeared.  From Detective King's memo...
When I looked into the file I noticed that my final case notes were not present.
Wonderful.  So a veteran new reporter decided to do a story smearing a sitting mayor based on notes provided by a commissioner who is a political enemy of said mayor.  I guess taking the time to go through the police reports and researching the subject matter aren't part of Carmel's m.o., too much work for that third rate swill that Ms. Cafiero calls reporting.

Tomorrow we'll examine the hysterical high faggotry exhibited by a former City of Miami police chief whose sole intention it was to detract attention from the firing of one his cronies from back in the City of Miami days and to get people talking about a nude mayor running around his house in front of underage girls...


  1. Thank You Straw Buyer, for the public service and truth you provide to the community.

    Up until now, this has been a crazy story, difficult to understand. A sixteen month gap in reporting - really?

    Chief Martinez de Castro should send out his resume, if he isn't doing so already - he is gone. Perhaps the Orchestra for Corrupt, Disgraced Ex-City of South Miami Officials has an opening for a trombone player - the chief can apply, and sit along side Hector Mirabile, currently playing the world's smallest violin.

    WSVN is a joke journalistically - the only question is whether Carmel Cafiero is on the take and the stories were planted, or was she duped?

    Commissioner Valerie Newman is the one that needs to be recalled. She is the rat that must be eradicated from city politics.
    Rumor has it the Corrupt Orchestra also happens to be looking for a Tuba player. Qualifications - must be a fat urchin, and a serial, manipulative liar. Commissioner Newman - take a seat, here's your Tuba.

  2. I for one am proud to live in a City where the Mayor's cock is so outrageous tat it scares away burglars. All Mayorial candidates from here on in should have to prove tat they have a cock big enough for the City over which they preside. I will wager that all this has come about because Commissioner Newman is jealous that her cock is not big enough to be Mayor.